Overcoming agoraphobia and anxiety through exposure therapy with God

Overcoming agoraphobia and anxiety through exposure therapy with God

what's going on guys I just felt like it's been a while since i made a video and i see that i'm actually getting a few views i spoke with the guy through my comments and i see that there is a need to talk about the agoraphobia and what better time to do it then after I just achieved something that I was afraid to achieve just I don't know two weeks ago I was able to go about five and a half miles up one Street and I was able to go about seven miles up another street and both streets ran parallel but of course there's one connecting street that runs perpendicular to him and that was like an unknown for me I had no practice on that or anything so I was like you know what I'm gonna take the seven mile trip because if I am able to make it then you know it'll be a shorter ride back and if I'm not able to make it i'll try another day but while I was driving up there I started thinking to myself it's the fear that cripples us but can you imagine if we were on the battlefield we have people volunteering to go fight in someone else's country what kind of courage is that and and I'm battling driving I think it was a total of fifteen miles round trip so I was probably about seven and a half miles out at my furthest point and that's just one example it might be a lame example but it's an example nonetheless some jam into guns and roses heading up to where I'm going as I approached the first spot where i normally turn around turn off the guns and roses turn on my Christian music station here in Cleveland and I start feeling my throat get in tight me and everything my heart starts beating but I'm like I'm all right I felt this before see that's another thing to go off a little bit of topic I don't want to ramble but you already had I already had but you already had your worst panic attack it doesn't get worse than that I mean seriously think about it all the times you thought you were going to die all the times we thought we were gonna die all the times I thought oh my god I'm having a stroke acting like Fred Sanford this is the big one I'm coming out though or whatever his wife's name was we're still here so we have an undefeated record against our anxiety or at least our poisonous thoughts and i know i might alienate some people who listen to me by saying this medication I don't know if it's helped or not because it's there's a lot of downsides to it but I got to give all the glory to God as soon as I started taking these trips thinking to myself God is omnipresent meaning God is everywhere and anywhere at the exact time that you need him at the exact time someone's house who I drove by that was sick might have needed um I mean he's there he's with you and he got me through it no it was odd is I used to work somewhere I don't know maybe about a decade and a half ago I don't even know this little stretch of road that connected want you know point A to point B the two streets that I was okay with but the connecting street I was afraid to um you know travel down cuz it was unfamiliar to me I used to work on that street I used to sell computers at compusa it's not compusa anymore but I started seeing these familiar things and this feeling like this big grin just came over my face like wow you know I ain't been here for years I had no idea this this was that little section that I could I wasn't sure I could handle you know and it's like the anxiety turned into like getting pumped up like yeah all right look we're on that I ain't been here in at least two years probably three years maybe longer I don't know but it was awesome to do anyway then I got back into my comfort zone back towards the street that turns on to a street that it's a main road but it leads basically back to my house and sitting at that stoplight the heart started pounding really bad and everything I completely lost that warrior state that warrior mentality I'm like oh my god okay well I live in the 21st century I have a cell phone which I'm taping this on right now you use that to call 911 if I have a heart attack I know I'm not going to have a heart attack but I can't convince my symptoms of that so the light turned green made you know made my turn felt a little bit better then you know I guess just being a little scared or whatever you know little um what's the word I'm looking for I don't know I was a little disoriented I thought I passed the hospital and then I seen the hospital approaching I'm like oh god I'm not as close to home as I thought I'm like but immediately I was like yeah but I only live about five to seven minutes away from this hospital so from that point on I just started crossing all these familiar landmarks and it was like I never really even left my comfort zone and I seen this internet mem me mem I don't know what they're called I'm I'm a kid of the 90s we didn't use these words um it says your comfort zone is a very beautiful place but nothing ever grows there and that is so true I'm going through some issues right now I have one friend besides my kids I mean I'm a pretty lonely guy as you could tell I'm outgoing on camera I got no problem sitting in my car by myself uh you know talking to people that I don't know I'm fine on camera and I'm fine around people too but i do have social phobia as well as agoraphobia and i don't want to be trapped with no friends with no you know just loneliness because of a condition because of a way of thinking that somehow God ingrained in my brain that's wrong it's totally wrong there are no invisible lines that if I cross the main street and broad street intersection all of a sudden I'm more inclined to have a heart attack or I'm more inclined to pass out at the wheel or any of that I mean if you read all the anxiety stuff when you're having an anxiety attack your The Incredible Hulk you could lift a car off at outlet toddler that's how people do it they get thats true you know the adrenaline and it's like you just you gotta look at it that way but every time I'm scared every time I'm terrified and I think about Jesus it doesn't go away completely but I feel I feel like he's telling me to calm down I feel like he's telling me fear not and his words are soothing no I I don't hear them I'm sure they'll probably be a few atheists you know that might watch this or laugh or whatever I wish I could hear him I'd brag about it if I could hear him you feel him and I felt him today as I drove past my old place of employment when things weren't as bad as they are now and that tells me something if my agoraphobia had a beginning it's gonna have an end it's not infinite and if I could give a tip to anybody who's gonna watch this weather five people watch it cuz i know i'm not that entertaining you look at it might be a likable guy but i'm not really that entertaining not to watch on TV anyway then it's worth it because I know if I could go back in time and show myself these videos or instill in myself that you're not broken you're just bent you're not you know you're not defeated you're not defeated until you're six feet under and even then you're going to a better place so hey you know I mean if you want to call that defeated whatever but uh I feel like I'm starting to ramble now but you know I mean I just I got that adrenaline pumping through my veins I think I'm gonna end it because yeah and I don't want to bore you guys I just want to thank you very much I want to thank the community the agoraphobia community on Facebook you guys are all wonderful i still remember um when i was at the doctor's appointment and you guys posted nearly a hundred posts a hundred things in my thread supporting me trying to get me through that i I don't have the words for that that was amazing to me to this day i am still speechless and because i mentioned you i'm going to have to post this on your page I love you guys I love all you guys that are out there battling whatever it is I don't care if you're battling cancer I don't care if you're battling divorce I don't care if you're battling um you know the loss of a loved one um we all have our trials and it's up to us how those trials define us on youtube look up um Steve Harvey I think it might be called jump he has a very inspiring video where he's talking to the cast at a family feud or whatever not the cast with the crowd oh my god man i really never cared for the guy personally and I have nothing against them I just really didn't care but after after watching a few of his inspirational videos that guy is amazing that guy shot to the top of my you know celebrity list that guy that guy's awesome anyway I'm gonna end it I said I was gonna end it two minutes ago and rambling I'm gonna go celebrate man I'm gonna go drive in another circle whoo thanks for watching guys hit like and subscribe or uh you know give me a comment I'd love to make more videos I'd love to be interactive with you guys um you know if you guys are out there I know my view counts aren't that high um I don't I haven't figured out this YouTube thing yet um but I think we all pretty much suffer from some type of loneliness if we have agoraphobia social phobia uh and I have both so I'm sure you know they've I'm not sure everyone with social phobia has a agoraphobia but I'm pretty sure a lot of people with agoraphobia have social phobia because how are you supposed to get to the places where you socialize I don't have social social phobia at my house I have social phobia when I have to go somewhere out of my comfort zone or in the edge of my comfort zone and there's people I don't know blah blah blah anyway thanks for watching god bless you

3 thoughts on “Overcoming agoraphobia and anxiety through exposure therapy with God”

  1. joshua christiansen

    congratulations today my daughter is giving birth and I couldn't even get down the street pray I over come this cause I'm missing out on life

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